on being a traitor ...

I've been thinking about what to do with my life come August when this internship is over and I have to be a grownup and buy furniture. In order to buy said furniture, I'll need steady employment.

The AP doesn't guarantee jobs to any interns like it used to, but word on the street is that if you're good and willing to relocate then you've got a 75 percent chance. The point of this blog is not to speculate on if I'm good enough or if a job offer is in my future, the point of this blog is to speculate on what exactly that future should, or will be.

I've spent the past four years, and intensely the past nine months figuring out what I think journalism should be. I've spent hours over drinks, in my car, in the bath, at the gym contemplating the Internet and the future and how newspapers should adapt. And the only conclusion I can come to is the Internet is an amazing opportunity to do meaningful journalism. That newspapers must adapt by embracing its possibilities and re-imagining the purpose of print.

And here I am in an organization that is almost isolated from the rest of journalism. I'm in a place where I can't be part of this transition, where it's not necessary to be part of it.

If I was a purist, and an idealist, I would find the shittiest newspaper I could and go in there and try to figure this out from the ground up.

If I was a realist I was call idealist me an idiot and list of a litany of reasons why I should stay with the AP including job security in a frightening industry, union membership, guaranteed benefits and other measures of security.

Here's the thing, I miss newsrooms, I miss newsprint, I miss the product.

And I'm not sure if any amount of security can replace that high I get when collaborating with a talented group of people.